life · marriage

My beef with “kahwin muda”

Not for me lol I’m definitely not muda already. It just hit me this morning that I’m much, much closer to 30 than I am to 20, especially when I heard my sister verbalise exactly how old she is. Cos my age is however old she is plus 4. But I still feel like 18 inside. Or even 16. Cos that’s how old I was when I physically stopped growing (sadly, only in height though lulz) kirakan still same size as I was when in sec 4 la KONONZ

So yes. Topik of kahwin muda. something happened today and it may or may not be related to this topic but I can just say that it is not nice AT ALL. 

I think for me, personally, especially in the context of Singapore, there is SO MUCH a child/teenager/young adult should and must do before the topic of marriage should even cross your minds.

Education, first and foremost because of our social status in this country. to me its an ibadah seh if you contribute to the increased status of your community.

Financials second because you are still alive in the dunya, aren’t you? Yes your Islamic values may not be aligned with the values of all the infidels (im being sarcastic) around you in this country, but you are still in this country aren’t you? 

Repaying your “debt” to your parents because lol your parents spent money in this dunya so that you may be alive and well in this Dunya right? Your parents did not feed you purely on faith, love and prayer kan. Where is your bakti to your parents if at the moment of your sexual awakening you call on the powers of the holy book to have yourself wedded off so that you may not live a life of sin, again, based on your parents money cos, dude, you are still alive in this Dunya amiright. The Akhirah has its specific T&Cs, but so does this Dunya. Amiright. 

I mean, bab extremism, bab sembelih, bab makan halal, bab zakat, bab organ donation, bab boleh pegang anjing ke tak, bab syia is demonising, bab wahabbi penyeleweng Islam terbaru… pandai je korang follow and put in place pelbagai macam unspoken and official rules and regulations for or against something, tengok pada keadaan Singapore, suitable or not. 

Tapi bila bab kahwin je semua tetibe jadi Islamic purists… 😩😩 konon like love conquers all la gitu. Tapi bila bab degrading and demonising Shias from Sunnis, takde pulak that same “love conquers all” type of mindset. (Ok sorry tersasar jauh but seriously that is another rant for another day.) 

BUT YOU GET WHAT I MEAN OR NOT.

Girls need education. I think we can study from ANY civilisation that as long as there are SOME educated girls in the midst, that generation will prevail against any hardships or problems. Men leave ALL THE TIME whether by choice, or forever, but the women stays with the child, nurtures the child, teaches the child about life from the very first breath that it takes. How do you suppose to get a succeeding generation of QUALITY if the women who raise them have none because they are too busy being childbearing machines ONLY and from such a young age?? 

Ugh. Sorry. Guess I’m too emotional. But sorry I don’t believe you should get married while you’re still a wee young adult studying and struggling to get by day to day. You can’t even be responsible for yourself. How do you expect to be responsible for an ummah, which is basically what is going to spawn from your loins thanks to your great sexual awakening but also cos thanks to your heightened knowledge in Islam from all those Islamic classes you attend you know you must defeat Syaiton and complete half your deen at all costs even at the expense of other peoples’ wellbeing cos if not they will be accomplices to SIN. 

I mean since you use that argument then, win liao lor. Game over. KO. GGXX. See you in Jannah. 

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